The Fabulous Four - script, version 1.0

Major Characters:

Reed Richards / Mr. Fabulous - Brains and father-figure of the team. A handsome, articulate, straight-acting, mainstream... and frankly boring... spokesman for LGBT heroes. Gay.

Johnny Storm / The Human Flame - Reed's life partner. Hot-head of the team. Younger than Reed and more public with his displays of affection. Acts rather campy, especially when "flame on". Bisexual.

Sue Storm / The Invisible Lesbian - Johnny's older sister and mother-figure of the team. People tend to overlook her because she's so often invisible. She tries to embrace the irony. Lesbian.

Brenda Grimm / Miss Thing - A gruff but gentle-hearted woman trapped in an ugly, masculine body of stone. The noble, tragic figure of the team, of course. Transgender.

Tanya Raycroft - Host of Hour America, a topical-issues-themed TV program. Straight.

Captain Hatter - A mad scientist kidnapping young girls to Never-Wonder-land. Straight.

Franklin Richards - 8-year-old son of Sue and Reed (and Johnny and Brenda). Probably straight.

XY - A group of mutant queer men, led by lovers named Wolverine and Cyclops. Gay, of course.

Sisters of Humanity - A mutant lesbian collective: Gaia (Storm), Rouge (Rogue), and Lipstique (Mystique).

Rev. Geoffrey Stryker - A crusader against the mutant and homosexual agendas. Almost straight.

DareDevil - A superhero who takes excessive risks due to his internalized homophobia. Gay.

Northern Strait - Quebecois superhero (of Alpha Flight). Doesn't approve of homosexuals as role models. Straight.

The opening pages are full-bleed with black gutters. This is how we'll treat scenes of the FF in action, which tend to have more gravitas. These are in contrast with the inter-cut scenes of a TV program, with traditional white margins and gutters. The different page treatment will emphasize that this isn't a TV show with fights during the commercials, but two separate narratives intertwined.

1- Half-page panel. A 30-foot white rabbit is menacing a NYC street, sitting upright. The FF are racing down the street (backs to us, the main focus of this panel is the bunny) to stop it. Each hero looks different from normal. Include these different details throughout the book, but try not to draw attention to them on this page. For most of them that'll be easy.

CAPTION
"They're household names..."

2- Johnny is flying circles around the mega-rabbit, distracting it from attacking the crowd or noticing the efforts of his family. He is in his mid-20's, drawn mostly according to the standard model, but he has a little hoop earring in each ear, neatly groomed sideburns, and about a square inch of trimmed whiskers on the tip of his chin.

CAPTION
"Known to everyone and loved by many..."

JOHNNY
Hey, big fella! Check me out!

3- Sue is invisible (she's inked but not colored; the background color behind her is washed out), projecting a force field (same visual treatment as Sue) that's protecting a handful of people from getting stomped by the big bunny's foot. One of them is a moderately tomboyish teenage girl, whom we'll see again on page 2. Sue is in her early 30's, also on model, except for a fairly short, not-quite-boyish haircut, and short fingernails.

CAPTION
"But some say they are a menace to our children..."

SUE
You're OK, folks. Just get out of here!

4- Reed has wrapped one of his arms several times around a sturdy utility pole, the other around the hyper-hare's neck, pulling it down to street level. He's in his early 40's, and the only difference from the standard version is a more contemporary - but still conservative - hairstyle, with no grey temples.

CAPTION
"A threat to family values."

REED
Hurry, I can't hold this behemoth down for long!

5- Grimm delivers a haymaker punch to the rabbit's face. Note: Don't show his face here. Ben's usual shorts have been replaced by a tank top and a short skirt, and he's wearing a shoulder-length blonde wig, but play that down. If you can.

CAPTION
"Welcome to Hour America. I'm Tanya Raycroft. Our subject tonight..."

GRIMM
Relax, Reed! It's clobberin' time!

Splash page!

The now-unconscious rabbit serves as a backdrop. Johnny (a faint trail of fading flames and wisps of smoke showing that he's just landed and "flamed-off") is flamboyantly giving Reed a sloppy kiss on the cheek, and putting his arms around Reed's waist. Reed has a hand (on the end of a slightly-elongated arm) on Johnny's shoulder, smiling but a little embarrassed by Johnny's exuberance. Sue is smiling warmly, shaking hands with the girl she saved on page 1, who is positively thrilled just to meet her, let alone have this special reason to thank her. Brenda Grimm - yes, I said "Brenda" - is sticking close to the rabbit. She looks just like Ben would look, except for the costume and wig difference described earlier, somewhat overdone lipstick, polished fingernails, and obviously false eyelashes. She does not look like a female version of Ben; she looks like Ben. She knows people are afraid of her, and she doesn't want to scare off Sue's or the boys' fans, so instead she's just hanging out "inconspicuously" until the others are ready to leave. There are a dozen or two other people still nearby, gawking at the monster. Or at the heroes. Most are either applauding or admiring. A few are unsmiling, disapproving. A man and woman are steering their 8-year-old boy away from the scene, one of them looking back angrily at Reed and Johnny, the other looking at the kid, worried that the boy's just been scarred for life... not from seeing the monstrous rabbit, but from being exposed to the quartet of monstrous freaks. A teenage boy gives them the finger... from a safe distance.

CAPTION 1
"...Homosexual Superheroes."

LOGO
(partially behind caption 1)
The Fabulous Four

CAPTION 2
(nameplates by each character)
Reed "Mr. Fabulous" Richards

CAPTION 3
Johnny "The Human Flame" Storm

JOHNNY
My hero!

CAPTION 4
Sue "The Invisible Lesbian" Storm

GIRL
...my hero!

CAPTION 5
Brenda "Miss Thing" Grimm

CREDITS
writer - Todd VerBeek
artist - Alan Moore
colorist - Dave Sim
letterer - Ernie Bushmiller

Switch to pages with outside margins and white gutters between panels. Use this treatment for all scenes of the TV show.

1- TV screen-shaped panel: The "Hour America" logo (something with a clock-and-US-flag motif, suggesting the kind of prime-time news program that chooses its "serious" topics for ratings appeal, like "Dateline" or "20/20") super-imposed on a montage of Captain America, Thor, and Iron Man.

VOICEOVER
As a society, we've grown comfortable with the presence of super-powered beings.
Some have evil intentions, but more of them seem to be on the side of the angels.

2- TV screen: "Hour America" logo on montage of Xavier, Beast, Iceman

VOICEOVER
Most of us have made an uneasy peace with the existence of mutants,
whose genetic anomalies make them different from ordinary humans.

3- TV screen: "Hour America" logo on montage of gay pride parade-goers: drag queens, dykes on bikes, heavily-pierced leathermen in chaps and vests.

VOICEOVER
But public homosexuality remains a difficult subject
especially when combined with the phenomenon of popular superheroes.

4- TV screen: Tanya Raycroft, the host of "Hour America", behind her desk on the mock-newsroom set. She's the only person there, and the show's logo hangs behind her. The FF "4" logo is superimposed over the shot, without obscuring either Tanya or the show's logo. Tanya is good at her job: not really a serious journalist, but not a schlocky exploitationist either. She's attractive and carefully packaged for the camera, but she's bland enough to look like a credible reporter, not eye candy. (I see her as African-American.)

TANYA
We begin tonight by speaking with the self-styled superhero "family" of the Fabulous Four.

5- Cut to a different set, this one more like a talk show, with fake living room motif (e.g. bookshelves, coffee tables). We're no longer viewing this from the camera/audience's perspective, so use normal panel shapes and move your own "camera" around for the best angles. Include the studio cameras when appropriate. The FF and Tanya are seated "Tonight Show" style, with Tanya in a chair off to our right, facing the guests, and (in order, starting next to Tanya) Reed, Johnny, Sue, and Brenda in a row of chairs going off to our left. The FF are in costume, but everybody (except Brenda) looks normal here (i.e. not invisible, on fire, stretched). Reed is seated casually, one ankle resting on the knee of his other leg. Johnny has his legs crossed at the thighs, leaning on his armrest toward Reed, hands in his lap. Don't go overboard; this is supposed to be characterization, not caricature. Sue sits with her legs together, not crossed. Brenda sits on an oversized chair about the only way she can: like a fat trucker.

TANYA
Good evening, Mr. Richards.
Or do you prefer "Mr. Fabulous"?

6- Medium close-up of Reed, with Johnny to the side. Reed chuckles affably, with the mannerisms of a relaxed businessman. Johnny smiles coyly, glancing sideways at Reed.

REED
Please, Tanya, call me "Reed".
The name "Mr. Fabulous" was Johnny's idea.
It's not really my style.

JOHNNY
I'll be the judge of that!

1- Back up to show Tanya (from behind and to the left), Reed, and Johnny. She's addressing Reed.

TANYA
So, Reed, it's true then that you and Johnny Storm - "the Human Flame" - are...

JOHNNY (overlapping) REED
Lovers. Partners.

2- Medium close-up of Reed. He's embarking on a fascinating (to him) in-depth account of his and Johnny's courtship.

REED
Johnny and I first met many years ago, when I rented a room from his aunt while attending Columbia University.
Of course Johnny was only a boy at the time so obviously there was nothing romantic between us.
That didn't develop until years later, when ....

3- Medium-close shot of Johnny, leaning forward to steal Reed's spotlight, tossing him a smile and a look that says, "oh do shut up already, you luscious piece of man-flesh, you," at Reed. He has his index finger and thumb a centimeter apart to indicate "a very small amount".

JOHNNY
Anyway... to make a long story just a teensy bit less tedious...

4- Backup to show them as a couple. Johnny's pointing with his left hand (palm up, limp wrist bent backward) at Reed, with the right hand (wrist bent inward) pointing at himself. Reed is a little taken aback at being interrupted, but Johnny does it to him all the time, so he deals.

JOHNNY
Sue talked Reed into asking me out, we hit it off like Butch and Sundance, and the rest is history.

5- Tanya addressing Johnny and Reed, doing that annoying "quotation marks in the air" thing with her fingers.

TANYA
So what made you two decide to "come out" as a couple?

JOHNNY
I got tired of not being able to smooch in front of other people.

6- Reed is a little exasperated by Johnny, but lovingly so: eyes rolling, but chuckling.

REED
Well, it wasn't quite like that.

1- Reed explaining to Tanya. Lots o' gab, so leave plenty of room for it.

REED
As public figures - "superheroes" if you wish - we've experienced a great deal of affection from people in all walks of life.
People entrust us with their protection - with their very lives - and we felt an obligation to live up to that trust.
When the rumors started, we felt it was important to be honest, to be open about who we are. We owe it to the public.

2- Focus on Johnny, with Reed next to him. He's put his hand on Reed's knee, gesturing with the other, talking earnestly and intensely.

JOHNNY
We're role models, you know?
Gay relationships aren't like those horrible rumors about Hawk-Owl and Zippy.
We're what a real gay couple looks like.
(OK, I'm actually bi, but that's not the point.)
Granted, we aren't all as dashingly handsome as Reed and disarmingly cute as me,
but it's the relationship that matters.

Switch to full-bleed/black gutters. We're back to superheroics now, and I want to draw attention to how we're "coding" the pages by making the switch back right here in the middle of the page where the readers will notice it.

3- Back to the bunny. Long shot of the giant white rabbit and the FF, now standing close together and discussing the situation. (Clarification: the rabbit is not participating.) Don't put them in a perfect circle, though: Johnny is standing closer to Reed than two adult men would normally stand, and Brenda is standing back just a little. The Fabulous-car is swooping down on autopilot to land next to them.

SUE
A rabbit this large couldn't have come from anywhere on Earth, could it?

4- Reed is in the foreground, getting a gizmo out of the car and answering the others, seen behind him.

REED
It seems rather improbable.
A spatiodimensional scan should indicate whether it may have come from the Negative Zone, an alternate timeline, or another world.

5- Worm's-eye view, showing how big the rabbit is, with the FF standing in front of it. Reed is pointing the gizmo at the rabbit, looking at the readout panel on it. Brenda looks up at the rabbit. Sue and Johnny are talking quietly together.

BRENDA
Looks like something straight outta Hell to me...

6- Medium shot of Reed returning from his scans to tell the others. Brenda is still looking at the rabbit, probably listening. Johnny and Sue are all ears. So to speak.

REED
You were right, Sue: it's not from around here. It has a dimensional variance that identifies it as coming from another plane of reality.
It appears to be one fairly close to our own, but I'll need to further analyze these readings at the lab.

1- At the lab. Reed is sitting at a console in the background, Johnny standing and looking over his shoulder with his hand on the other shoulder. Sue is in the foreground, reading something on another terminal that resembles a new iMac. Brenda is playing Scrabble on the floor with Franklin.

SUE
Reed? What time did the big white rabbit appear?

2- Close shot of Sue, still reading, looking increasingly puzzled... and concerned. (Reed speaks from off-panel.)

REED
I think it was 9:25 or so. Why?

SUE
I was just looking over the 9-1-1 logs to see if there were any similar sightings.

3- Medium shot of Sue, ignoring Johnny. He's just walked over, smiling at his levity, but also curious about her findings.

JOHNNY
And there was a giant cock seen in Central Park?

SUE
No, there were several missing-child and abduction reports phoned in starting around 9:30.

4- Medium shot of Brenda and Franklin on the floor. Brenda has stopped in mid-tile-placement, and is looking over at Sue, alarmed at the implication. Franklin doesn't like the sound of that, either.

BRENDA
That's gotta be a coincidence. Doesn't it?

5- Reed has gotten up from his console and is walking briskly toward a door, addressing the others as he goes.

REED
Johnny, why don't you and Sue look into that some more?
Meanwhile, I've identified the alternate dimension the white rabbit came from!
Brenda, I'd appreciate your assistance with this.

6- Medium shot of Sue at her console, Johnny looking over her shoulder. We see Reed and Brenda disappearing behind a closing door. Sue looks especially disturbed and worried by what she's just noticed. Johnny is incensed by what Sue is telling him. Franklin is still sitting at the Scrabble board in the background, looking scared.

SUE
Johnny! The missing children... they're all girls!
While we were dealing with that rabbit, someone was kidnapping little girls!

JOHNNY
What?!

1- Back to the studio. Medium shot of Tanya and Reed.

TANYA
I understand the "Fabulous" family isn't just the four of you. You have a little boy.

REED
Our son, Franklin.

2- Pull back to include Johnny. Tanya is pressing for a clearer answer. Johnny is offended at her question, leaning forward and with arms and legs positioned as if he's about to get out of his chair to slap her.

TANYA
I'm sorry, but exactly whose son is he?

JOHNNY
Ours! All of ours!

3- Viewpoint from behind Tanya's head. Reed leans forward to help keep Johnny at bay, and puts a calming hand on his shoulder as he addresses Tanya. Sue and Brenda are visible behind them and to the side.

REED
Sue is his biological mother, and I'm his biological father.
Johnny and Brenda take an equal role in raising him.
So, like Johnny says, he's all of ours.

SUE
He has at least twice as many loving parents as most children.

TANYA (off-panel)
But doesn't he get confused about who his real... that is, his biological parents are?

4- Medium shot of Brenda and Sue. Brenda has a wry smile, launching a deadpan insult. Sue tries to hide her smile.

BRENDA
He's a bright kid. It ain't that hard.
You caught on pretty quickly.

TANYA
So where is Franklin?

5- Spider-Man (with his mask off) rough-housing with Franklin in the FF's living room. Peter has Franklin's feet in a web, and is swinging him around in circles. Franklin is in the foreground, having a blast and grinning from ear to ear.

CAPTION
"A neighborhood friend is sitting with him."

6- Sue, Johnny, and Reed. Sue (as well as Reed) is now gently restraining Johnny.

TANYA (off panel)
What about the danger to him from super-villains or...

JOHNNY
Listen, b*beep*! We're f*beep*in' better parents than the kind of...

1- Reed is once again playing the diplomat. But this time he's stern in his response, chiding Tanya.

REED
What Johnny means is that this seems more a question about our status as superheroes,
and has nothing to do with our gay, bi, lesbian, and transgender identities.
Did you ask Iron Man when you interviewed him last month whether he had any children?

2- Tanya is flustered. Reed has properly put her in her place. So she's changing the subject.

TANYA
Well, no, I suppose not.
So... speaking of "transgender", that brings us to Brenda Grimm, better know as "Miss Thing".

3- Medium shot of Brenda, a bit of Sue showing. She's exasperated at such a tasteless - and hurtful - question.

TANYA (off-panel)
At the risk of being indelicate, could you explain, well... what you are?

BRENDA
Sheesh! I'm a human being, just like you.

4- Medium-close shot of Brenda, looking at the floor, gesturing at her body She's been over this before, and it depresses her to talk about it.

TANYA
I mean...

BRENDA
Yeah, I know what you mean.
I'm a woman. I've always been a woman.
When Sue, Reed, Johnny, and I were exposed to cosmic radiation, my body was changed.
Into this.

5- Close shot of Brenda, now looking us in the eye with her baby-blues. She still has her self-respect and self-image.

BRENDA
Everybody looks at me and assumes I'm a man, but I'm not.
I'm a woman trapped in a big, masculine body of stone.
But I'm still a woman.

6- Brenda, Sue, and Johnny. Now Brenda looks like she's about to get up and clobber. Johnny is finally a little restrained, but still pissy, gesturing at Tanya. Sue is getting impatient, rolling her eyes.

TANYA (off panel)
Is this body anatomically...?

BRENDA
None of your freakin' business, buttinsky.

JOHNNY
Listen, girlfriend, you wouldn't go and ask the Hulk what he's packing! Or would you?

1- A group shot of Brenda (trying vainly to strike an indignant lady-like pose), Sue (fully opaque, leaning forward, holding out her right hand, sort of waving, for Tanya to look at), Johnny (glowering at Tanya, literally smoldering), Reed (an arm on Johnny's shoulder to calm him down, the other hand rubbing his temples to alleviate his growing headace), and Tanya (leaning back slightly, taken a bit off guard by things).

SUE
Excuse me, Ms. Raycroft.
Am I still visible?

TANYA
Why... yes, you are... Why...?
Oh! I'm sorry if I seem to be overlooking you.

2- Sue, Johnny, and Reed. Sue has a wry smile on her face. Johnny is glad to have a chance to say something nice about his sister. Reed also welcomes the change of topic and wants to run with it.

SUE
When I started calling myself "the Invisible Lesbian" I didn't expect the name would be quite so prophetic.

JOHNNY
Sue's powers aren't as flashy as, say, mine, but she's just as important to the team.

REED
As well as to the family. And I say that not only because she's Johnny's sister and Franklin's biological mother.
In many ways she's the glue that holds us all together.

3- Sue and Johnny. Johnny is now in full charming, chat-with-the-babe mode. Sue is glaring at Johnny, with an expression that says "Shut up, dear brother. I can speak for myself."

TANYA (off-panel)
Do you feel pressure as such a visible... that is... such a prominent lesbian?

JOHNNY
She's a great role model, not just for lesbian girls but for any...

SUE
Johnny? I'm right here.

4- Closer shot of Sue, looking earnest and worried. Johnny is partially visible off to the side, sheepish.

JOHNNY
Sorry.

SUE
Of course I feel pressure! It's not something I would've asked for.
And it's not like I don't have enough to worry about without that too.

5- Just Sue. A smile returning to her face, with genuine joy.

SUE
But one of the most gratifying parts of being a successful woman in the public eye
is hearing from other women and girls that I inspired them to try whatever it was they wanted to do.

1-Establishing shot of Brenda and Reed standing in front of a doorway filled by a shimmering, distorted, semi-reflective surface. (This is the "looking glass" of Alice through the....) Reed is adjusting some knobs on the control panel next to it, holding some kind of tricorder kinda device in his left hand.

REED
I've adjusted this experimental dimensional gateway I've been constructing,
to match the dimensional variance I detected in the giant rabbit.

2- Closer shot. Reed is halfway through the reflecting surface (which ripples outward a little like the surface of water), looking back at Brenda and putting his right hand on her shoulder. Brenda is stepping forward.

REED
Then let's get going!

3- The other side. We see Brenda emerging from the doorway in Never-Wonder-Land. Reed is already looking around, somewhat astonished. They are in a distorted landscape, resembling a large formal English garden. There are several sets of 7-foot-tall playing cards arranged in tightly-sealed groups of 4, each set making a kind of tall, open-roof cage.

BRENDA
Woah!

4- Reed's attention (in foreground) is now focused intently on his tricorder. Brenda (in midground) is looking around, trying to take it in. The garden makes up the background.

REED
Most of the standard laws of physics appears to function normally here.
But time isn't flowing properly: we aren't aging.

5- Wider shot, including Reed, Brenda, and several of the playing-card cages. Two voices come from separate cages, not the nearest ones, but a few cages back.

GIRL 1
Who's there?

GIRL 2
Shh! I think it's him!

6- One of these two card-cages is in the foreground, Reed and Brenda running up to it. Reed is stretching, to run faster and so he'll be able to see over the top of one of them. Brenda's moving as fast as she can.

REED
Girls' voices! They're in these... cages!

1- Down angle on Reed and one of the cages. He's stretching his arms down into it, reaching for Cindy, a 7-year-old girl in a frilly Alice-in-Wonderland dress. She's clearly not Alice, though: she's Korean with a contemporary hairstyle. She's shrieking. Reed is baffled. Brenda is looking up at Reed.

CINDY
Aiieeee! Don't touch me!

REED
She's... afraid of me!

2- Up angle. Brenda has jumped up and is hanging onto the top of one of the cards. It's bending downward under her massive weight, about to snap at the bottom.

BRENDA
Let me take a shot at this.

3- The card has snapped, Brenda has fallen backward onto her butt, and the terrified little girl rushes toward her.

4- Brenda holds the girl in her arms, protectively.

BRENDA
There... there... We'll get you home, sweetie.
What's your name?

CINDY
Cindy.

REED
Brenda!

5- A giant crocodile (big enough to swallow a Hummer whole) bears down on the threesome. They're all dead if they don't move. So they are. Reed is running by leaps and bounds, an arm extended back to help Brenda and the girl along. Brenda is getting to her feet, girl still in her arms.

REED
Back to the gateway!

6- From the viewpoint of the crocodile's shoulder. Reed is at the gateway, holding the door for them as it were, still helping Brenda along with his arm. Brenda lumbers toward him, girl in arms. The silhouetted crocodile jaws loom.

CINDY
Lady! The others!

7- Close-up of Brenda and the girl entering the gateway. Brenda has a look of grim determination.

BRENDA
Don't worry, dear. We'll come back for them.

1- TV screen: Close-up of Tanya at her desk, parts of the "Hour America" sign visible behind her. A graphic of the "XY" logo fills the space next to her head. The logo is a combination of the classic X-in-a-circle logo that the X-Men have worn as a belt buckle over the years, and a block-style half-undone zipper as the Y.

TANYA
If all gay heroes seemed as wholesome as the Fabulous Four, there might not be such a furor about them.
But there's a dark side to this phenomenon: gangs of homosexual mutants.

2- TV screen: A crookedly-aimed, poorly-lit shot of Tanya addressing a handheld video camera in a queer mutant bar. It's little more than a badly-lit room with assorted chairs and tables, a bar stocked with a store-bought keg and a few cases of cheap liquor. Like a midwestern gay bar in 1970. Tanya's outfit is an attempt to "blend in" while retaining her professional image... but it's too neat and mall-bland to look like she belongs, and too trendy to be respectable. Oh well.

TANYA
I'm here on location, a nameless underground club in an undisclosed part of New York City.
This unlicensed bar is a hang out for an all-male mutant group called "XY".

3- Wide shot of Tanya, Wolverine (ageless), and Cyclops (30-ish) seated at a table in the corner of the bar. Wolvie and Cyke are both in leathers. Cyclops' jacket is scratched in places: always 3 parallel lines, spaced about as far apart as Wolverine's claws. One set of scratches goes clear through the leather. He also has a matching trio of scars running down one side of his face, some of which is obscured by his hair, but the back edge of his earlobe is missing, and his visor has corresponding nicks in it: Scott likes it rough. One shoulder of Wolverine's jacket is scorched through: Scott sometimes loses control and opens his eyes. The boys sit on a bench, straddling it; Cyclops is smaller and slighter than Wolverine (full-on macho version, but don't make him look like the Hulk) and sits in front of him, reminiscent of how they used to sit together when Logan was teaching young Scott how to ride... a motorcycle. We can see them being taped by a nervous-looking het mundane with a handheld cam, standing behind and to the side of Tanya (so he can get the back of her head in shots). He's not dressed to blend in; he doesn't want anyone thinking he's "available". The rest of the bar's clientele are keeping their distance, but about half are watching the proceedings with curiosity. Some of them are in similar leathers, others are more alternapunk or gothboy in style, a few are mutant dance queens slumming... a mixed crowd. A casual use of mutant powers here or there (e.g. levitating a beer glass, walking through the men's room door) would be a nice touch.

TANYA
I'm talking with the leader of XY, a mutant known by the codename "Wolverine".
His, uh, "boyfriend" is called... "Cyclops".

4- Close-up of Wolverine, some of Scott visible in the frame. His response is stern and to the point. He's not angry. He just doesn't like her, or her kind.

TANYA
So. "Wolverine"... who are "XY"?

WOLVERINE
We're queer mutants. We were born this way. We're going to stay this way. We're not going to go away.

5- Focus on Cyclops, Wolverine showing behind him. He points backward over his shoulder at Wolverine, with his left thumb. He points at the "XY" symbol on his jacket with his right hand.

CYCLOPS
See, "XY" defines us, makes us unique.
It's the male genetic signature, so it's a symbol for our identity as a male couple.
It's our genetics that makes us mutants - they call it an "X factor".
And it's our genetics that makes us queer - we call it the "Y factor".

WOLVERINE: We're Homo Superior... Homo!

1- Wider angle, showing a variety of the other patrons.

WOLVERINE
That's what makes us different from assimilationists like Fabulous or Xavier.
And don't get me started about self-hating nutcases like DareDevil.
We like being different.
If it ain't right for you, then good! Shove off.

2- Tanya, cameraman, Wolverine and Cyclops are in the distance. In the foreground are three refugees from the Xavier Academy at the bar, goofing around a bit like drunk teenagers (because they are). Two are sitting on stools, holding hands on the bar; one has a tail and little wings. The third is sitting on a cushion of cloud.

TANYA
What do you say to people who claim you're a bad influence on youngsters?
That impressionable boys - mutant or not - might try to emulate you?

3- Medium shot of Wolverine, Cyclops and Tanya (and cameraman). Scott is leaning forward, gesturing.

CYCLOPS
<snort> I say they don't know what the hell they're talking about.
Listen, when I was growing up, I felt like the biggest freak on Earth.
When Xavier invited me to join the X-Men, I finally started to feel like I belonged somewhere.

4- Close shot of Cyclops. He's remembering a very painful part of his life, and it shows on his face, even behind his visor.

CYCLOPS
But as a queer kid, I still felt isolated, an outcast even among outcasts.
My best friend Jean sensed what I was feeling before... before it was too late.
She put me in touch with Wolverine.
Logan here showed me that I could embrace the "Y" in my genes, along with the "X".

5- Wolverine reaches around Cyclops' waist and grabs the inside of his (Cyke's) thighs, leering. Scott leans his head back and nibbles Logan on the chin, smiling.

WOLVERINE
More like embracing the Y in my jeans, you little horndog!

6- Cyclops turns back to Tanya, serious again.

CYCLOPS
I love being XY.
But I never would've come down this road unless I was already on it.

7- Wolverine with a big wry grin on his face.

WOLVERINE
Hey, you mundanes should be happy we're queer.
At least us XY's aren't breeding any more mutants!

1- TV screen: Tanya back at her desk on the set. The logo next to her head now is for Sisters of Humanity: the classic X-Men belt buckle, but with the lower-right leg of the X extending outside the circle, and then crossed by another bar to make another X. It's similar to the traditional symbol for Venus/women, but at a 45º angle.

TANYA
Another band of homosexual mutants has a decidedly lower testosterone level.
They are Sisters of Humanity, a "collective of differently-enabled lesbians".
I spoke with three of them - they don't have a leader as such - at their woodland retreat in upstate New York.

2- Tanya sitting in a clearing in the woods, with Gaia, Rouge, and Lipstique. There's a fire pit in the center and 6 hand-made benches made of unprocessed tree trunks (each big enough for 2) in a circle. The sky is overcast. Tanya is sitting on one bench, Rouge and Lipstique are next to each other (but not touching) on the next bench, then Gaia on the next. Gaia is Storm, with a more new-age name and attitude. She's dressed like your typical granola lesbian: down-to-earth, a little butch, no make-up. Rouge is a pretty, average teenager with a streak of white hair and gloves. Yes, she wears makeup. Lipstique starts out looking all blue and naked like Mystique, but with smaller-than-average breasts and short boyish hair. Her lips are your sister's favorite shade of red lipstick. Two camerawomen with conventional remote gear are set up with good angles on Tanya and on the Sisters.

TANYA (voice over)
They are "Gaia", whose mutant power connects her with the weather,
and a couple known as "Lipstique", who can change her appearance,
and "Rouge", who declined at first to identify her powers.

3- The back of Tanya's head, Rouge and Lipstique partially obscured, and a good view of Gaia's face. Gaia's rolling her eyes, disappointed with how lame... er, physically challenged the interview is already.

TANYA
So, what are the Sisters of Humanity? Do you consider yourself militant feminists?

GAIA
{sigh} People think that being a lesbian mutant is all about hating men, and power, and so on.
But we're really all about love! Love for ourselves, love for each other, and love for Mother Earth.

4- Close-up of Rouge, gesturing with teenage enthusiasm, but keeping her hands close to her at all time.

ROUGE
We may be different, but we don't consider ourselves better. We get on pretty well with XY.
(OK, the potluck last month turned out bad, but no one got permanently killed.)
And we still got friends back with the X-People.

5- Medium shot of Lipstique, spreading her arms a little as if to say "look at me", but maintaining eye contact with Tanya.

LIPSTIQUE
And we're not trying to be like men, either.
I like to just be myself,

6- Lipstique morphs into a very pretty woman. Not some fanboy's wet dream with melon-shaped hooters, 10-inch waist, 4-foot legs, and big hair, but a healthy-looking woman with a nice figure, tastefully-applied makeup, jewelry, and hairstyle (perhaps resembling Tanya, but less artificial) and a sexy but practical dress.

LIPSTIQUE: But I also like to be pretty and extra feminine.

1- Group shot of Gaia, Lipstique, Rouge, and Tanya. Gaia smiles approvingly. Rouge looks at Lipstique admiringly, and giggling like the schoolgirl she is. Lipstique playfully vamps a little, tossing her head back, kicking out a leg, and daintily extending a hand toward Tanya, as if she should kiss it. Tanya is briefly stunned.

ROUGE
Yeah, that's why we call ourselves "Rouge" and "Lipstique",
to mess with the idea that mutant lesbians are all butch and scary.

2- Close-up of Gaia. Smiling warmly and earnestly explaining her beliefs.

GAIA
That's the central wisdom of the Sisters: You can be whoever and whatever you want to be.
Rouge and Lipstique here are perfect examples of that principle.

3- Three panels in a row, the same medium shot of Lipstique and Rogue: Lipstique has just morphed to look like Rouge.

4- Rouge puts her arms around Lipstique, who stiffens a little but doesn't resist.

5- Rouge morphs to look like Lipstique's "pretty woman".

TANYA
(off panel or nearly so)
Uncanny.

6- Medium close shot of Tanya. She's still amazed, but recovers just enough to ask one last pointed, "insightful" question.

TANYA
I can't help asking though:
What about motherhood? Don't you miss the chance to have children?

7- Medium shot, up angle on Gaia, smiling slyly, Little Orphan Annie eyes, with her hand on her very slightly rounded abdomen. The clouds open behind her, with sunbeams shining down, giving her an apparent halo from our vantage point. Can you say "Blessed Virgin"?

GAIA
If one of us had the mutant power to induce pregnancy, that wouldn't be a issue, now would it?

1- The FF are assembled at the dimensional gateway. Reed and Sue are making sure everyone understands their role in the mission. They all look pretty grim, not just Grimm. Johnny is giving Reed a thumbs up. Franklin is watching, concerned.

SUE
Cindy's afraid of men like her kidnapper, and the other girls probably will be too,
so Brenda and I will take the lead approaching them.

REED
I'll help open the cages but stay back.
Johnny, you keep an eye out for the crocodile... and whoever's behind all this.

2- FF in Never-Wonder-Land. Reed is weaving one arm into the hedges and using the other - well extended - to pull down playing cards, with considerable effort. Brenda is tearing them down as before. Sue is shepherding girls to the doorway, carrying one and guiding another with her arm. Johnny is patrolling the sky. They've freed a dozen girls so far.

3- Johnny in foreground, sees the crocodile, the white rabbit, and a flying teacup approaching from the distance. The rabbit is on the villain's left side, crocodile on his right (reversed from our perspective).

JOHNNY
Incoming monster! And he's brought his croc and bunny!
(Definitely not Kansas....)

4- Medium shot of Sue and four girls. She's hastily giving them friendly but firm instructions so she can help confront the villain.

SUE
OK, I need you girls to be brave for me. See that shiny doorway? Get through there as fast as you can.
The other girls and my little boy will be on the other side waiting for you, and you'll all be safe.
Now go!

5- Down angle. Brenda joins Sue on the lawn. Reed is a few (of his) paces away.

BRENDA
There's still about five or six more girls.

SUE
They'll be safe where they are until we take care of this creep.

6- Slight up-angle on our heroes as they form a defensive line. Reed joins Sue and Brenda. Johnny lands. (They stand in this order, from our left to right: Reed, Sue, Brenda, Johnny.)

SUE
Everybody ready?

REED
Affirmative.

JOHNNY
Born that way.

BRENDA
Bring it on.

1- Capt. Hatter arrives. He's a tall, thin, dark-haired man (hence Cindy's fear of Reed) in a flying teacup. (Don't blame me for it being surreal. Blame Lewis Carroll.) He wears a hat similar in style to the Mad Hatter's and a coat similar to Capt. Hook's. The crocodile is on one side of him, the rabbit on the other. He's genuinely astonished that anyone would be so evil as to interfere with what he's got going here.

HATTER
What are you doing?!
You're kidnapping my darlings!

2- Close-up of Johnny. He can't believe this guy is for real!

JOHNNY
You kidnapped them!
We're saving them!
(Reed, this guy's definitely a few yellow bricks short of a road.)

3- Group shot of the FF from the back, Hatter facing them, his teacup now on the ground. The bunny and croc don't fit in the frame, but we see their feet. Hatter is, of course, delusional, and here he grandly expounds upon his delusions.

HATTER
No, I saved these precious little girls!
I saved them from the horrors of the real world and growing up!
This place is a cross between Never-Never Land and Wonderland.
I call it Never-Wonder-Land! I am Captain Hatter, their father.

4- Close-up of Hatter, smiling with joy at the thought of this paradise he's created for them... or is it for him? Whatever. He doesn't see any difference.

HATTER
I brought them here, where they'll never have to wonder about their future!
They can stay young and perfect forever, society's rules don't apply, and they're free to do whatever I want!

5- Close-up of Reed, one eyebrow cocked and a finger extended to say "gotcha!" He's caught Hatter in a slip of the tongue, and hopes to push him further off-balance with it.

REED
Aha! But what about what they want?
You brought them here against their will.

6- Close-up of Sue, following Reed's lead with an impassioned plea.

SUE
They don't want to be your toys. They want to be girls.

7- Close-up of Brenda. As far as she's concerned, it's way past clobberin' time. This creep wants to take away from these girls the very thing that's been taken away from her. If looks could kill....

BRENDA
They want to grow up, to be women.

1- Medium shot of Tanya in a one-on-one interview with Matt Murdock. He's seated across from her, dressed as if for court, his cane at his side, sitting poised and professional.

TANYA (voiceover)
The non-mutant hero DareDevil was recently "outed",
exposed by a newspaper article identifying him as a homosexual.
Although DareDevil himself refused to speak with us, his attorney Matt Murdock had this to say:

2- Close-up of Murdock, speaking calmly but firmly.

MURDOCK
First, my client denies the allegations.
In any case, he has never wanted to be a public figure or role model.
He just wants to contribute to society.
And he... he's not the bad guy.

3- Tanya leans forward, looking concerned. She's doing this for the camera, of course, since Murdock can't see her.

TANYA
Does DareDevil have some kind of death wish?
Is that why he dares to take such risks?

4- Murdock is troubled. He has his cane in hand and is getting up to leave.

MURDOCK
I have no further comment.

5- TV screen: Tanya back at her desk. There's an Avengers "A" logo next to her head now.

TANYA
We asked the world's most respected superhero team, the Avengers, to talk with us for this program, but they declined, citing other commitments.
Instead Captain America gave us this written statement:

6- TV screen: Head and shoulders shot of Captain America, mouth closed because he's not talking, labeled "Captain America" for the idiots in the audience.

VOICEOVER
"This country of ours was founded on the principle of tolerance, and I'm proud to have fought in defense of its freedoms against tyrants of all kinds. Anyone who fights that fight alongside me is someone I call a friend, regardless of their color, creed, gender, age, disability, veteran status, or personal relationships. The Fabulous Four are my friends."

1- Back to medium shot of Tanya doing a one-on-one with Northern Straight (seated on the opposite side from Murdock, to emphasize the change of interview subjects). He's NorthStar, but apparently straight. (So not really any different.)

TANYA (voiceover)
Northern Strait, a long-time member of the Canadian team Alpha Flight, offers another perspective.

NORTHERN STRAIT
Listen, I have nothing against Richards, the Storms, and "Madame" Grimm personally.
They are all quite brave and many good women and men owe them their lives.

2- Medium-close shot of Northern. He's quite serious about this, and is in fact barely concealing his contempt.

NORTHERN STRAIT
But there's a difference between their public deeds and what should be their private lifestyle.
I don't go around flaunting my sexuality! There are kids out there watching!
It's no one else's business and I keep it to myself.
They should as well.

3- Medium shot of Tanya and the Rev. Geoffrey Stryker. Flip-flop the seats again. He's a handsome, middle-aged fundamentalist protestant minister in a conservative business suit. He starts out talking with gravity.

TANYA (voiceover)
The Rev. Geoffrey Stryker of the Nationalist Family Association takes an even harder line.

STRYKER
Tanya, our families are in danger!

4- Now Stryker shifts into exaggeration and hyperbole, which he states more forcefully to establish its veracity.

STRYKER
Already mutant leaders like Magneto have admitted that their aim is to control us.
And his old buddy "Doctor X" can even take over our very minds!
We've seen that these homosexualist mutants want to remake us all to be like them... or to die!

5- Tanya has a mixed agenda: Let the man have his say, so she can't be accused of being part of the Liberal Media®; Let the man make a fool of himself, because you don't need to be part of the Liberal Media® to despise everything he stands for. So her expression is neutral. He, on the other hand, has leaped decisively into crazy-land, gesticulating like a wildmon.

TANYA
But what about gay heroes like the Fabulous Four, who aren't mutants?

STRYKER
They're the proof! It's already happening!
The mutants turned that "Mr. FAGulous" into a pederast,
They provided mutant-enhanced pornography to recruit that girlie boy of his, "Johnny Flamer".

6- Extreme close-up of Stryker, weeping openly. If he were wearing mascara, it'd be running down his cheeks.

STRYKER
Then this so-called "family" unnaturally conceived another toy boy, just for the Flamer to molest.
I grieve for the plight of that poor child Franklin Richards!

1- Short, wide shot from the back of Johnny, Brenda, Sue, and Reed facing down crocodile, Capt. Hatter, and rabbit.

JOHNNY (quietly)
Not to be a pessimist, but I don't think Croc + Bunny * Cuckoo = a situation we can talk our way out of.

2 -Medium shot of Reed and Sue, both poised for action. Sue is grim. Reed is stoic.

SUE (quietly)
Agreed. Bunny, Reed?

REED (quietly)
Yes. Then Hatter.

3- Medium shot of Brenda and Johnny, also poised. Johnny has a hint of a smile, looking forward to this. Brenda still looks like she could kill.

JOHNNY (quietly)
So, Brenda... croc?

BRENDA (quietly)
It's. Time.

4- Johnny scorches past the crocodile's eyes, burning and/or blinding them. Brenda lands a solid blow to the crocodile's lower jaw.

5- Reed has entangled the rabbit's limbs in his own. Sue projects a force field into the rabbit's exposed belly, knocking the wind out of it.

1- Wide view from behind Capt. Hatter in his teacup. He sees Johnny and Brenda kicking the shit out of his crocodile and Reed strangling his rabbit. He is panicked.

2- Medium shot of Hatter, reeling from an invisible blow to the face.

3- Zoom out and Sue becomes visible, standing over unconscious Hatter, her fist still clenched. She has a satisfied - but grim - smile on her face.

4- Half-size panel. Medium shot of Franklin peeking through the gateway, worried.

5- Half-size panel. Closer shot of Franklin, smiling, relieved.

6- Big panel, taking up bottom third of the page. Triumphant shot of the FF walking back through the broken card-cages (toward the gateway), with unconscious crocodile and bunny a short distance behind them. Sue carries two little girls in her arms, smiling at them. Brenda carries three girls, all clinging to her; she seems contented. Johnny carries one sleeping toddler, a little awkwardly and with a good-natured "how did I end up with the baby?" expression. Reed carries Hatter, unconscious and wrapped up in one arm, the other arm around Johnny's waist, a sad but satisfied smile on his face.

This page is to be done full bleed with white gutters (different from both other treatments), drawn in a noticeably different, highly realistic (maybe painted?) style. This is reality.

1- Franklin wakes up, bleary-eyed, in bed.

2- Franklin in the kitchen, getting milk out of the fridge. He's in his pajamas: pull-overs with full-length sleeves and legs, and a "4" logo on the chest.

3- Franklin sitting at the kitchen table, drinking his milk. Ben - yes I said "Ben" - Grimm is in the kitchen doorway, wearing an open bathrobe, white bunny slippers, and his usual diaper.

BEN
Couldn't sleep?

FRANKLIN
I had a dream.

4- Ben sits at the table with Franklin, pouring himself a glass of milk. Franklin is giving a very thoughtful recollection of what he remembers of his dream. Big panel, to leave room for the monologue.

FRANKLIN
There was this guy you were fighting who was taking girls away.
And you dressed like a girl.
And Uncle Johnny acted kinda silly.
Mom and Dad didn't love each other...
I mean, they did, but without the mushy stuff, y'know?
We were still a family, but it was... different.

5- Ben leans forward concerned, putting his hand on Franklin's arm to reassure him. Franklin is thinking over what Ben is saying, head cocked to one side, glass half-full of milk half-way to his mouth.

BEN
Sounds like a pretty bad nightmare.

6- Close up on Franklin. He's decided that, no, the dream wasn't really that bad, and has the sort of contorted highly-expressive face that kids use when talking about something remarkable. And he's finished his milk.

FRANKLIN.
The guy was scary, but the rest was just kinda weird.
Like I said, we were still a family.

7- Franklin hopping off his chair and heading away from us, back to bed, leaving his empty glass on the table. Ben still sits there with his glass of milk, puzzled, watching him walk away.

FRANKLIN
G'night, Uncle Brenda!